


The Freedom All Men Chase

by starwhims



Category: One Piece
Genre: Established Relationship, M/M, Post Time Skip, kinda angsty but more just a realistic depiction of sorta dysfunctional relationships, spoilers for almost every arc post ts including whole cake and wano
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-19
Updated: 2019-11-23
Packaged: 2021-02-12 23:08:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 8,832
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21484354
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starwhims/pseuds/starwhims
Summary: Zoro and Sanji are too different to make it work, but just alike enough to want to try.previously titled Pretending but that's a shitty name so i changed it.
Relationships: Roronoa Zoro/Vinsmoke Sanji
Comments: 16
Kudos: 122





	1. One

**Author's Note:**

> music stylings  
https://youtu.be/aGvS285hfjA  
https://youtu.be/ApXoWvfEYVU

Everything about Zoro and Sanji’s relationship was a contradiction. They were too different to make it work but just enough alike to want to try. Life for them was a series of late night blowouts that made everything look like it was done for good, and then one of them climbing into the other’s arms even later and pressing gentle apologies to each other’s jaws. It wasn’t perfect at all, but sometimes that made the good moments worth it. 

The time had passed from late night to early morning, and Sanji was sitting with Zoro in the crow’s nest. He hung out the open window, a cigarette lazily hanging between his fingers, and Zoro’s head in his lap. Their late night rendezvous in the crow’s nest were where Sanji felt most at peace. The nicotine hit differently this late/early, and the stress of the day just seemed to melt into puddles on the metal floor. 

Zoro sat up, his earrings jingling, and gestured for a drag of Sanji’s cigarette. It had caught Sanji off guard the first time the swordsman had asked to share a smoke, but he was used to it by now. Zoro liked to act like he was too good for vices, but he was just as weak as the rest of them. Sanji passed off the cigarette silently and let his hand fall back out the window, the gentle sea breeze rushing through his idly splayed fingers. 

“So,” Zoro said, breaking the silence they had been peacefully steeped in for the past hour. “Wanna go to sleep?” 

“Now?” Sanji checked his watch before speaking again. “It’s only one.” 

“Yeah? Everyone else is asleep.” 

Sanji rolled his eyes playfully. Since when had everyone else being asleep stopped them. He could think of something he’d rather be doing right now, and it certainly wasn’t sleeping. Crawling toward him, Sanji plucked the cigarette out of Zoro’s mouth, taking a brief drag and opening his mouth against the other man’s. He breathed the puff of smoke into Zoro seductively, and Zoro, in return, inhaled it. Zoro turned his head, and the cook began pressing feather light kisses into his upper cheek. 

Zoro turned his head again and pulled away. “I’m not in the mood.” he said. Sanji pulled back, not surprised at Zoro’s proclamation but bothered nonetheless. 

“You haven’t been ‘in the mood’ for weeks.” Sanji muttered, crossing his arms. 

Zoro sighed. “Sanji...” He didn’t use the cook’s first name often, but when he did it was always shorthand for ‘loosen up about whatever you’re mad about’ and Sanji wasn’t having it this time.

“I have to do some prep for breakfast,” he said curtly as he stood up and put his suit jacket back on. 

“Don’t be like that.” Zoro started. Rage welled up within the cook. He always did this, somehow made it Sanji’s fault for having emotions. 

“I don’t want to make you do anything you don’t want to, but you’ve been acting so distant lately. I don’t know what I did, but whatever it was I’m sorry!” Sanji surprised himself with how loud he had gotten. That had practically been a shout. 

“It’s not anything you did.” Zoro said sternly, standing up from the bench. 

“Then what is it!?” They studied each other for a moment. Zoro’s brows furrowed, and his lips were drawn downward, but he didn’t look angry. He looked like he was feeling guilty more than anything else, Sanji thought. “If you’re not going to tell me, I’m going.” 

Zoro was silent. Opening the hatch Sanji crawled down the mast hastily. Stupid moss head, couldn’t talk about his damn feelings if it fucking killed him. There was obviously something wrong, but what, Sanji couldn’t even begin to guess. They went about their usual routine and sometimes things almost seemed normal, but then Zoro would do something off, and they were back to square one. 

Sanji found himself in the kitchen, where he always ended up after one of their fights. Sitting at the table, he tried to keep from going over everything like a case file to pinpoint exactly where things had gone wrong tonight. Eventually though, his eyes began to feel heavy and giving in to sleep at the kitchen table seemed like a really good idea. 

“Sanji?” Lethargic, he looked up at Nami standing above him. “Did you sleep in here?” Sun dappled through the window in the kitchen, the sight of it making Sanji bolt upwards. 

“What time is it?!” 

“It’s nine.” 

“Fuckfuckfuckfuck!” he repeated like a mantra, as he stood up with great urgency. “I’m usually half way through breakfast by now.”

Nami laughed and sat down, a glass of orange juice in her slender hand. “It’s okay. It’s Sunday, and we’re anchored; everyone’s sleeping in.” 

Falling back into the chair he had slept in, Sanji collapsed into the table, burying his face in his arms. Thankfully Nami didn’t say anything, just kept sipping her juice and keeping whatever she was thinking to herself. Sanji turned his head, letting the left half of his face out from beneath his jacket sleeves. With one eye, he looked at Nami. Her brow was knitted, worry painted across her face. 

“Are you okay?” 

“No.” 

“Do you want to talk about it?” 

“No.”

Setting down her juice glass, Nami huffed a little bit and put her hand on Sanji’s arm. “Talk to him.” 

“He won’t talk back.” 

“Well at least take a shower; you look like shit.” 

Sanji smiled. Nami was always there to tell it like it was. Scooting the chair back with a squeak, he stood up.

“I’ll start on breakfast after I shower.” 

Nami hummed, satisfied that Sanji was heeding her advice, and waved at him as he exited the kitchen. He trudged down the hall, his feet barely leaving the ground. God, he must have looked so disheveled. A shower seemed like the perfect thing right now. Damn Nami, she was always right. 

Stripping down and leaving his suit in a pile on the bathroom floor, Sanji turned on the faucet and held his hand under it till the water was hot on his skin and the bathroom was filled with foggy steam. Sanji stepped in and immediately felt better. The water hit his back and pricked his skin in streams until he was numb. 

There was a rustling outside the curtain, but Sanji ignored it. It was probably Usopp. He was usually up around this time and always brushed his teeth first thing in the morning. Closing his eyes, Sanji focused on massaging the expensive shampoo through his scalp. His mind was wandered to how he was almost out of it, and they were nowhere near an island right now. There was a rustling against the curtain, and he opened his eyes.

A tan hand reached through and pulled the curtain aside. “Room for one more?” Zoro said. 

It made Sanji smile that Zoro even had to ask. They had showered together more times than he could count. Another sign of normalcy. Sanji nodded, and Zoro stepped in, fully clothed. 

“Oi! Take your clothes off!” he shouted, but the swordsman ignored him in lieu of leaning in and pressing his wet shirt against Sanji’s bare chest. “You don’t do anything you’re told.” Sanji said through a laugh. 

“Isn’t that what you like about me?” Zoro said, wrapping his muscular arms around the other man and running his lips along Sanji’s temples. 

“No. Life would be a whole lot easier if you just did what I said.” Sanji pushed back against him, trying to seem indignant but not being able to suppress a laugh. 

“I do what I’m told.” 

“Just for Luffy.” 

“If you were the captain I’d follow your orders, too,” he murmured against Sanji’s damp skin, his lips stretching into a smile. Sanji chuckled and buried his face in the crook of Zoro’s neck. Their banter never seemed to cease, even when they were in the most compromising of positions. 

Zoro began to run his hands up and down Sanji’s naked torso. His hands were large and calloused from constant sword fighting and weight lifting, but they felt so warm and safe that Sanji had all but forgotten the roughness. He continued to run his hands all the way down to the cook’s waist and then down his hips. Zoro dropped to his knees. 

Sanji was already half hard from anticipation, but Zoro took no mind and swallowed his length completely. The fiery heat of the inside of Zoro’s mouth caused Sanji to fall into the tiled wall of the shower, the water splashing against his face furiously. Wrapping his hands around Sanji’s muscular thighs to balance himself, Zoro ran his tongue along the cook’s shaft as he slid his lips down Sanji’s cock. 

“Fuuuuuuck.” Escaped Sanji’s lips. Zoro had been terrible at blow jobs when they first started, but he learned fast and now knew exactly how to drive Sanji mad. It had been so long since they had done anything that he already felt close just from the contact. Zoro was going to make fun of him, but right now Sanji didn’t care. He just wanted release. 

Tension mounted in his hips as Zoro bobbed up and down at a steady pace, using his tongue generously. Sanji grounded himself in Zoro’s mess of matted and dripping green hair, but it didn’t help much, and soon enough he was surrounded by an explosion of white hot energy. As he came down, 

Zoro popped off with a smack of his lips, Sanji’s cum dribbling in thin web out of his mouth. The cook took a moment to revel in the afterglow of his own expulsion, letting the now lukewarm water spill down his face. Zoro pressed his face into Sanji’s torso and breathed heavily. 

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, almost too soft to hear over the running water. 

“S’okay,” Sanji replied, even if it really wasn’t. That’s just how things went with them. It wasn’t worth it to fight right now, and Sanji didn’t know if he even had the energy to, so he just let it go, like water trickling down the drain.


	2. Two

The deck was filled with the laughter of the crew. They all sat around a bonfire Franky had, in his Franky way, managed to build on the deck and drank creamy hot chocolate Sanji had made special for tonight. Sanji sat sandwiched between Nami and Zoro, watching quietly as Usopp told a tall tale of their time on Skypiea. 

“And then the Brave Captain Usopp fearlessly led his loyal troops into battle against the lightning god, Enel!”

“That’s not what happened!” Chopper chimed from Robin’s lap. 

“Let him have this one,” Robin said, smoothing some lopsided fur down on Chopper’s belly. Chopper made an adorable puffing noise and crossed his arms. Sanji smiled to himself at his crew’s banter. They didn’t get a lot of downtime like this, so it was always a pleasure to see the crew relaxed rather than in battle stances. 

There was a tap on his shoulder and Zoro leaned close to his ear. “Excuse yourself.” 

Seriously, right now? That wasn’t obvious at all.

But Sanji had trouble turning down the opportunity to be alone with Zoro. It had been a few days since the shower encounter and they hadn’t had a moment in between holding off a marine ship and docking in a winter island’s port. He looked at Zoro, who was blinking quickly to get flakes of snow out of long eyelashes, then turned back to the group. 

“I left the stove on,” he lied and stood up, dusting the snow off the blanket that had been sitting over his knees. Zoro stayed put, he would probably excuse himself after a few minutes to at least try to be subtle about it. 

On his way to the men’s quarters where he assumed they were going to hang out, he heard footsteps behind him. Sanji didn’t need to turn around to know they were Zoro’s. He walked very deliberately, sure of where he was going, even if that wasn’t the right way in the slightest. Zoro’s footsteps got closer until he was right behind the cook, placing his hands on Sanji’s shoulders. 

“Not there.” 

Turning around, Sanji gave the swordsmen an annoyed look before speaking. “If we were going to the crow’s nest why didn’t you just say that.” 

“Not the crow’s nest either.” Zoro grasped Sanji’s hand and pulled him down the hallway to the kitchen. 

“I’m not making you more food, we already ate,” Sanji said. 

“Will you stop making assumptions for once.” 

They entered the kitchen and immediately Sanji was met with the smell of cooked eggs, bacon and crisp pie crust. Where the hell was that coming from? He had made burgers for dinner, not... And before he could even question more, he saw a steaming quiche on the counter. He looked at Zoro for answers before it finally clicked when he saw the great and mighty Roronoa Zoro was flush with eager embarrassment. Zoro had...made him quiche lorraine? 

“You made this?” 

“Yeah.” 

“Like with your hands?” 

“What else would I make it with, stupid?” Zoro said rubbing the back of his head, his cheeks and neck literally bright crimson. Sanji literally couldn’t think of anything to say. This was weird, a good kind of weird, but weird. In all the time Sanji had known Zoro to never expend energy on anything but fighting and fucking. Especially venturing into learning a new skill, and to surprise him no less. 

“I-I don’t know what to say.” He must have looked stunned, he thought. The flush had faded form Zoro’s skin and he leaned in and scooped Sanji into a hug. 

“Happy anniversary,” Zoro said, his face pressed into Sanji’s shoulder. 

What the hell? How was it their anniversary? They had never even had a discussion that they were together in any official capacity and now Zoro was making him quiche for their anniversary? Sanji had learned over the course of knowing Zoro that there was more under the surface, but this kind of sentimentality had only come out once or twice and in very small ways. 

“I’m confused,” Sanji started. “When did we start dating?” He didn’t want to sound unappreciative or standoffish, he just wanted to get a grasp on the situation that was throwing him for such a fucking curveball right now. 

“Well it’s more like the anniversary of the first time we fucked, but same difference.” Zoro said, pulling away and looking at the cook with the most unadulteratedly pure expression Sanji had ever seen cross his face. This made Sanji smile sweetly, and put some puzzle pieces together as well.   
“This is why you were being so weird? You were learning to make quiche?” 

“It’s not as easy as you make it look, and it’s hard to get you out of the kitchen to even practice. So I had to cut our late night short and make you go to sleep so I could make a thousand shitty egg pies just to give you one good one.” Zoro began cutting the quiche and slipped one slice onto a plate. “Here, try it.” 

He set it on the table in front of Sanji along with a fork. Looking at it it was a little sloppy. The custard part of the egg was a bit runny, and the crust was darker than Sanji would have settled for if it was his own, but for a beginner it was pretty to look at. He picked up the fork and cut off a part with the side before putting it in his mouth. 

Surprisingly, it was pretty good. The crust is the hardest part of quice and while it wasn’t perfectly flaky and crisp, it was impressive for someone who had never cooked anything but grass protein shakes in their life. Looking over to Zoro who had taken a seat next to him, he smiled. 

“It’s good. Pie crust is really hard and even though it’s kind of tough it’s still tasty.” 

Zoro laughed, and pulled the plate over to take a bit himself. “Robin’s cook books aren’t anything compared to a lifetime of cooking, but I’m pretty proud of it,” he said, his mouth full of quiche as he did. 

“You should be.” 

They sat at the table for a little while, sharing the rest of the quiche in silence. Once they had eaten half of it, Sanji stood up and put a sheet of tin foil over it before placing it in the fridge without the lock. They had decided if Luffy found it tonight he could have the rest. 

They walked down the hall back to the deck where everyone else. When they got halfway up the stairs Sanji held back, grabbing Zoro’s hand so he would too. Zoro turned to him with a quizzical expression, but Sanji couldn’t help but smile. Pulling the swordsmen closer by the hand until they were on the same step, he cupped Zoro’s face in the crook of his palm. 

“Thank you,” Sanji whispered. “That was really sweet.” 

“If you tell anyone-” 

Sanji cut him off. “They wouldn’t believe me.” 

They both broke out in laughter, and for the first time since Sanji had met Zoro, he felt like maybe he knew him better than anyone else.


	3. Three (part 1)

“It’s so hot.” Sanji said, fanning himself with his hand. 

Zoro did one last arm curl and set the dumbbell down. “You have to stop wearing three piece suits on summer islands.” 

“Seconded.” Nami chimed in for the first time since she had forced the two men to carry all her cartography equipment up to the crow’s nest so she could get a better view of the cape of the island they were docked in. Sanji rolled his eyes and took off his suit jacket to appease them. 

It had been two weeks since Zoro had made the quiche for Sanji, and things were more or less back to normal. At least Sanji seemed to think they were, and that’s all that really mattered to Zoro. 

“I don’t know how you two hang out up here so much. It’s stuffy.” 

Zoro shrugged. “The windows open if you want some air flow.” 

“Please,” Nami replied, not looking up from the map she was painstakingly working on. Sanji pushed open the window and let his hand holding his cigarette hang out. Sitting down on the bench next to the cook, Zoro plucked the cigarette from his hand to which Sanji made a startled noise. He took a drag from the cigarette and leaned back, letting his arms stretch across the lip between the bench and the windows. 

“Did you just take a drag of Sanji’s cigarette?” Nami exclaimed. 

“Yeah?” Zoro took another drag.

“Y’all are weird,” she muttered, going back to her map drawing. 

Finishing off the last of the cigarette, Zoro put it out in the ashtray Sanji had bought last week to live in the crow’s nest. He was feeling restless today, and sitting in the crow’s nest lazily wasn’t helping. Zoro stood up and looked to Sanji. 

“I’m going to shore, you coming?” 

Sanji nodded and stood up as well. They skirted around Nami’s cartography stuff that was fanned out across the entire floor to get to the hatch. “Have fun, don’t talk to strangers.” Nami said, again not looking up from her map. 

They climbed down the mast, one after the other, and headed for the hull of the ship where the mini-Merry was. 

“Why’d you let Nami see you smoking?” Sanji asked as soon as they disembarked from the Sunny.

Zoro shrugged. “It’s just Nami.” 

Sanji didn’t say anything, instead focusing on driving the small motorboat to the dock ahead. The water was calm today and the darkness of the ocean disappeared out of view as they got closer to the shallow reef at the edge of the island. Zoro watched the frothy white they left in their wake and wondered if things would ever be this clear again. 

Zoro climbed up to the algae riddled and frankly unstable planks of the dock and tied the mini-Merry down. He reached out his hand, and Sanji took it for stability as he climbed up as well. Sanji’s hands might have been the swordsman's favorite part of him. They were soft like rabbit fur, but had a sturdiness to them that never seemed to wane. The cook cared for them like they were his treasure, and Zoro couldn’t help but treasure them as well. 

They strolled along the dock and onto the beach. “What do you want to do?”

“I dunno,” Zoro replied. Looking at their surroundings, he saw a small cove with a cave further up the beach and took off running towards it. Sanji shouted a curse and took off after him, catching up quickly. Sanji should have been a runner. He was fast, much faster than Zoro, and had a stamina for sprinting that Zoro could never match. Couldn’t lift worth a damn, but upper arm strength wasn’t everything, he guessed. Slowing down, Zoro came to a stop before being tackled to the ground by Sanji. 

“You asshole!” 

“Ugh, you got sand in my robe!” He wriggled underneath the cook, but Sanji had him pinned down, straddling him with his unbelievably strong thigh muscles. 

“You deserve it for taking off without me!” he said through laughter so intense he started coughing. “And it was stupid anyway; you’re never going to beat me in a race.” Sanji leaned down, still straddling, and pressed his forehead to Zoro’s. Tilting his head, damp blonde hair falling against Zoro’s brow, Sanji brushed his lips against Zoro’s. 

“I love you,” pressed against Zoro’s skin. and he could have sworn he was branded. Heat radiated from the spot where Sanji had whispered the three words, and suddenly Zoro felt like everything was closing in on him. Sanji’s straddle had loosened, and Zoro tossed him off like a ragdoll. 

“Don’t say things you don’t mean.” The cook stared at him from his position kneeled in the sand, a look of hurt confusion painted across his face. He didn’t say anything, and very suddenly, Zoro realized how callous that must have sounded. “C’mhere,” Zoro said, gesturing for Sanji to cross the few feet of sand. He hesitated briefly but ended up crawling over the battlefield between them. 

Sanji fell backwards into Zoro’s chest, who in turn encircled the blonde in his arms. He pressed his face into Sanji’s sweaty hair and breathed in his scent. 

“That was really really really stupid of me.” 

“Yeah,” Sanji managed to whisper.  


Zoro sighed and held him tighter. “I hope you can understand why I can’t say that right now.”

“I meant it.” 

“I know.” Shaking him slightly, Zoro spoke again. “Here. Get up.” Sanji climbed off and stood up, Zoro following. He grabbed the cook’s hand and began to pull him towards the cave a few yards away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this one's gonna be separated into two parts since it got kind of long. fucky next chapter get excited.


	4. Three (part 2)

Comfortable silence was their default, but right now the lack of sound besides the wind through the palm trees, felt so oppressive. When they reached the cave, Zoro scooped Sanji into a bridal carry. Protesting fiercely to being carried like a damsel in distress, Sanji exclaimed a slew of insults directed at Zoro.

“Put me down or I’ll kick you in the face!” Sanji was so petulant sometimes, like he had never grown past childhood, but right now it was more cute than annoying. Once they were deeper within the cave but not so far that there wasn’t any light, Zoro put Sanji down. 

Sanji huffed. “I can’t believe you carried me like that.”

“Get over it,” Zoro said as he began to undo the complicated wrap of his robe and strip his haramaki. “What are you waiting for? Take your clothes off.”

Looking around, Sanji made a face. “Here? It’s all wet.” 

“Take them off or I’ll take them off for you.” Immediately after the proclamation left his mouth, Zoro knew it had been a mistake. Sanji smiled, sly and devious before crossing his arms and planting his feet firmly where he stood. 

“Come and try.” 

He threw his clothes aside and walked slowly over to Sanji. This was going to be fun. Sanji already didn’t have his suit jacket on, so first Zoro ran his hand along the leather belt sitting on top of the slacks cladding Sanji’s legs. Slipping one hand up he untucked the dress shirt from the front and ran one of his large hands along Sanji’s lower abdomen. 

The cook had several out of the ordinary erogenous zones (including but not limited to: the crook of his knee, his clavicle, and the dip from his hip into his pelvic bone), and Zoro intended to take full advantage of all of them today. Large fingers ran over Sanji’s pelvic bone as Zoro used his other hand to undo the top two buttons holding his dress shirt closed. After pulling aside the collar, he leaned in and ran his tongue across the dip in Sanji’s clavicle, eliciting a hitch in the other man’s breath. 

Zoro smiled to himself and wrapped his arm around Sanji while using the other to unbuckle his belt. Even though he was doing his best, Sanji was at heart a man of power and passion. Zoro knew it was killing him not to be able to do anything in this challenge he had submitted to, but damn was it fun to watch. For the most part, Sanji stood still and sure in his conviction until finally Zoro had his pants zipper down, and then that all seemed to go out the window in the cook’s mind. 

Forcefully, Sanji grabbed Zoro’s shoulders and pushed him away. If Zoro had actually been trying to stay pressed against him, it probably would have been impossible for Sanji’s weak upper body to do so, but in the spirit of the game, Zoro let himself be thrown off. He watched as Sanji ripped open the rest of the shirt buttons and threw it onto the pile of Zoro’s clothing. 

“Do you have-” Zoro started, but quickly trailed off. Knowing Sanji, of course he had lube. Hell, Sanji made his own fucking lube. And was always sure to remind Zoro that his recipe for lube was vegan and hypoallergenic. Always. Zoro would usually just say it would be fine, but he still wasn’t sure what it was like to not have lube, since Sanji was so adamant about using it. He was prissy like that.

Sanji took the small bottle out of his pants pocket and threw it to the swordsman. Taking off his boots and pants, Zoro looked to Sanji who was, predictably, hard as a rock. Sanji’s dick was slender, but what it lacked in girth, it made up for with length. They were both naked now, and Zoro knew he was going to hear about how he had let Sanji get completely naked in a random cave later, but right now all he really wanted to show him he was sorry. 

“Do you wanna top?” 

They always had this conversation before sex. Most of the time neither of them cared, but other times they would get into foolish arguments about it. To Zoro at least, they both had their pros and cons. There wasn’t one he liked more than the other, and usually he was pretty blase about the whole topping/bottoming thing in general. Today though, he really wanted to get railed by Sanji. Zoro shook his head in reply. 

“That was easy,” Sanji said through a smirk. “Lay out your robe. I don’t want to get cave gunk all over us.”

“Okay, bossy.” Zoro turned and did as he was told despite the comment. As he was leaning down to spread it out, Sanji came up behind him, leaning his entire torso over Zoro’s back. He ran his pristine hands over Zoro’s chest and abdomen, progressively getting further down until he wrapped them around his thick member. 

Sanji made a purring sound against Zoro’s back muscles as he stroked him more. Fishing around in the sea of clothing on the cave floor, Zoro eventually found the lube and handed it to Sanji before getting on all fours.  


There was a squirting sound, and then just cold. Cold like the icicles that formed on the railings of the Sunny when they reached a winter island. Cold like a dead body after a few hours. So cold. Zoro winced and his breath hitched slightly as Sanji massaged the cold into his hole, until it was just as warm the rest of Sanji. 

“I’m gonna put a finger in.” Sanji warned, but went too fast anyway, and Zoro grunted. The cold returned, but only momentarily, and soon enough Sanji was finger fucking him. Sanji especially liked fingering and would draw it out as long as possible if left on his own. Zoro figured it had something to do with years of chasing after and sleeping with women, but it didn’t stop it from feeling so good. 

Warmth built up in Zoro’s hips, but he couldn’t get any kind of release as Sanji danced around his prostate like a ballerina. Suddenly the friction was gone, and Zoro felt empty. There was pressing against him as Sanji lined himself up and then it was oppressive fullness. It filled his throat, and burned like the end of a cigarette, but felt so safe in the same breath. 

Sanji let out an extended groan, before digging his fingers into Zoro’s hips. “You’re always so tight for me,” he said, breathless. 

Zoro just grunted in response, wiggling his hips a little bit trying to get more from him. Sanji wasn’t one to ease into anything, and bottomed out almost immediately. It grazed Zoro’s prostate, and the swordsman let out a moan that echoed through the cave. 

Slipping into a steady pace, Sanji fucked Zoro like a flame lapping at whatever it was turning to ash. It was always like this when they had sex. Too much passion and not enough strength to hold back. They were two headstrong men who couldn’t differentiate between their desires and their common sense, and sometimes that made it better, but most of the time it made things tangle until they were virtually impossible to unravel.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> today i offer you fucky...tomorrow who knows


	5. Four (intermission)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> self beta'd this one to post it asap. any and all mistakes are my shitty brain being bad at grammer.

Weeks had passed. Things were not okay. Sanji was trying his best to keep it together. To go on like normal, but rejection was not something he was well equipped to deal with. He had been having nightmares. Visions of the past. Of his father, of his brothers, telling him he was useless, a disgrace, not worth the amount of space his small body occupied in this world. He would wake up drenched in cold sweat, unable to scream despite the air in his lungs. Feeling the afterimage of the metal mask weight heavy on his skull.

Of course Zoro knew nothing of Sanji’s life before the Baratie. Had no idea that a simple lack of reciprocation would weigh on him like this. And he would never know. That Sanji was sure of. 

One night after an especially heinous nightmare, Sanji ended up in the crow’s nest alone. It should be a painful place to be, but there was still something about the way it smelled like Zoro’s sweat mingled with his cigarettes, that made things feel more tangible after the dreams. Running his hand along his jaw, he moved it back and forth which produced a grinding sensation. He had TMJ, exacerbated by years of wearing that iron monstrosity, that had been bothering him more lately. Absently, he thought about how he should tell Chopper about it. Maybe he could prescribe some pain meds.

There was the sound of the hatch opening. Looking in its direction, Sanji saw Zoro climbing through the hole and smiled weakly at him. 

“How’d you know?” 

“I heard you get out of bed,” Zoro said, walking over to sit next to him. Sanji smiled almost sardonically. Zoro had trained himself to be a light sleeper from a young age, and could wake up from the slightest change in his environment. Sanji had just hoped that maybe he would leave this one be.  


He pulled a cigarette from the pack, lighting it, and then taking the most shallow drag. Zoro’s thick brows were furrowed in thought, as he watched Sanji smoke.

“What’s wrong?” 

“Nothing,” Sanji said tersely. Zoro sighed and reached over to take the last cigarette from Sanji’s pack. He gestured for Sanji to come closer, and despite not wanting to he did anyway. Leaning in with the unlight cigarette hanging from his lips, he looked Sanji directly in the eyes. Zoro’s facial muscles were relaxed, but his single open eye pierced into Sanji’s like Nami’s telescope reflecting off the glass in the library. 

They stared at each other for a little while, until Sanji blinked from the night air blowing into his eyes, and Zoro broke out in laughter. “You lose!” 

“Only having one eye should qualify as an unfair advantage.” 

“Keep making excuses, loser.” 

The cook laughed and it felt foreign. Zoro finally lit his cigarette and took a drag. He watched as Zoro exhaled, the curling smoke climbing higher and higher until it fanned out when it hit the ceiling and dissipated. They smoked in silence for a little while, until eventually Zoro leaned onto his elbow and prompted up his face with his hand. He smiled at Sanji, genuine and fondly before speaking.

“Wanna go skinny dipping?” 

He made a face. “In the ocean? At four AM?” 

Zoro chuckled. “That’s the best time to do it!” 

Sanji smiled and rolled his eyes at Zoro’s unquenchable thirst to do the weirdest things at the weirdest moments. He was like their captain in that regard. 

“Sure.” 

They went down the mast onto the deck, where they stripped down, leaving their clothing on one of the lawn chairs Robin usually sat in. Looking over the edge of the Sunny’s railing, Sanji watched the slightly rambunctious waves crash against each other as the moonlight bounced off them. 

“Shouldn’t we have life jackets?” Sanji said, but Zoro was already standing on the railing. 

“If you can’t handle swimming in the ocean without a life jacket I’m taking away your monster trio license.” 

Sanji opened his mouth to reply, but Zoro had already jumped off the railing and into the ocean with a loud ‘yahoo!’. He leaned over the railing and looked down at the water where Zoro had just resurfaced. Cupping his hands around his mouth, Zoro called up to him.

“C’mon!” 

Damn him, Sanji thought. This was so unsanitary and it was going to be cold as fuck. Suddenly he was regretting agreeing to this. But alas, Sanji wasn’t one to back down from a challenge, especially one solicited by Zoro of all people. Climbing up on the railing, Sanji tried to mentally prepare himself for just how cold it was going to be. 

“Jump! Jump! Jump!” Zoro started chanting like the stupid jock he was. Sanij inhaled through his nose, the salty air filling his sinuses. Stretching out his arms, he took a graceful dive off the railing, and into the unknown. 

It was fucking freezing, but it wasn’t as bad as he had anticpated, and when he surfaced from his dive Zoro was there grinning like an idiot. “See, not so bad huh?” 

Sanji fake pouted and swam closer to the green haired man “It’s pretty bad,” he replied. Zoro rolled his eyes. 

“Loosen up, Mr. Prince.” Zoro saying his corny name from years ago, made Sanji splashed cold salt water at him. 

“I told you not to call me that.” 

“What? When you do something that cringey, you can’t expect me not to make fun of you ‘till the end of time.” 

“I WAS SAVING ALL YOUR ASSES!” Sanji shouted, maybe loud enough to wake everyone in a fifty mile radius of them up. They were both laughing now. Laughing like their ribs were going to split in two. Laughing like they used to. Laughing because there was so little to laugh about right now. 

Zoro dunked his head under the water briefly, and when he resurfaced his mouth was full of water. There wasn’t enough time to dodge it, so Sanji just closed his eyes and flinched as Zoro spit gross sea water in his face.  
“  
Gross!” Sanji exclaimed. Zoro waded closer to Sanji. “Something just touched my leg!” 

“Relax, that’s my foot,” he said as brough the cook into a bear hug.

“That was definitely a sea king and not your foot.” Sanji’s face was pressed into Zoro’s wet shoulder now, and he couldn’t help but think about how much warmer the ocean seemed when he was in it with Zoro. 

Sanji still didn’t know what to constitute their relationship as. He still didn’t know what dance they were doing as they circled around each other infinitely. The rejection at the beach still stung, and he was sure when he went back to sleep he would have the same nightmares. But one thing he could say for certain was that Zoro made him feel the freedom that all men chased, and he could only hope that was the same for Zoro.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so this is the end of effectively act one. i have another that will probably be four chapters as well. then another intermission, and then a final act to tie everything up. this might shape up to be the first long fic i've ever finished and posted. love that for myself. 
> 
> my tumblr is starsapphire so drop a line there if you want to talk about this fic or zosan or one piece in general with me!
> 
> edit: thank you to all the comments. i'm not going to answer them all individually cuz i'm crazy and i don't like the comment count going up from my own comments, but i sincerely appreciate each and every one of them.


	6. Five

Sanji’s left the crew. 

The minute the words left Nami’s mouth, Zoro felt as though he had been punched in the gut. The harshness of the action left him unable to breathe. Everything in Dressrosa had happened so fast that Zoro didn’t even have time to say goodbye, selfishly believing Sanij would be there when they met up again. 

When the discussion of going to Whole Cake to get Sanji back began, Zoro immediately intersected himself into the conversation. “I’m going.” 

“Zoro! You can’t go. You’re the strongest here besides Luffy, and you’re needed in Wano,” Nami exclaimed. 

“I don’t care!” This was a lie. He did care - about the crew and the looming threat of Kaido. It was his own regrets that caused him to feel like he had to go. 

“You’re not going,” Luffy said like a brick wall of conviction. With anyone else, Zoro would have fought for this, but Luffy was different. He was loyal to the captain. And whatever Luffy said was final. Hanging back, Zoro was silent. “Don’t worry, Zoro. We’ll get Sanji back!” Luffy said with one of his cheeky grins that always seemed to calm the swordsman's roaring heart. 

That had been two days ago. They were now traveling with Law and the Heart Pirates on their submarine. The Polar Tang had none of the comforting aura of the Sunny. It was dark and industrial, around every corner lurked metal and piping like the innards of a fearsome beast. There weren’t any sounds of the ocean at night like Zoro was used to, just an oppressive pressure that weighed upon his psyche. 

They ate all their meals in a cafeteria-like room. The Strawhats and the Heart Pirates usually sat at different tables and barely ever intermingled outside of the dining room. The guest rooms were like military barracks with sparse metal bunk beds lining the walls. They all slept in the same room, even Robin, which left Zoro little to no space to breathe, much less think. 

Law barley ever left the control room, but on the third day he approached Zoro in the dining room after everyone had finished lunch and gone to do other things around the sub. Zoro had just been trying to find a place to be without his crewmates forcing him to play cards or charades or one of those horrible word association games. The Strawhats were really bored. 

“Zoro,” he said, his voice low and lazy as it always was when Luffy wasn’t giving him an aneurysm. “Come with me.” 

The swordsman sighed and stood up from the picnic table. He followed Law down the dark hall to a room he had never been in. It was Law’s personal study. He opened the door and gestured for Zoro to follow. 

Shifting through his desk area, which was piled high with papers and medical text books, Law searched for something. Looking around the room, it had a different feel than the rest of the Polar Tang. Half of it was warmly lit, soft spotlights shining on shelves of more medical manuals and the messy desk. The other half was sterile and hospital-like - a fridge that hummed softly, the walls lined with cabinets that housed various supplies and medicine of all kinds, and a large stainless steel operating table covered in a thin sheet of paper. 

“You do doctor stuff in here?” Zoro said, trying to dispel the awkwardness he felt. 

Law looked up briefly at him. “You could say that.” 

Eventually, he found what he was looking for and pulled out a sheet of sheet of paper. “Luffy called earlier, you were asleep so I transcribed it for you,” he said, holding the paper out to Zoro. 

He hesitated very briefly. Did he really want to know what was going on with the retrieval team right now. It stung deep within his gut to even think about it. All the things he had never gotten to say to Sanji. All the moments they shared that now were hard to draw forth in his brain, too fuzzy and out of focus. Taking the paper anyway, Zoro began to read it. 

It wasn’t long. It basically just said that there had been some complications, but they were still working on getting to Sanji. There was a pang in Zoro’s gut, as his mind began to catastrophize the simplicity of “complications.” He knew that Sanji’s family were assassins and that they wanted Sanji to marry one of Big Mom’s children for a political alliance. Everything else that could be going on there was free reign for the nagging guilt in Zoro’s brain to elaborate on. 

Looking up at Law he tried to smile. “Thanks.” 

Law leaned back on his desk, his arms crossed and shoulders hanging low. “That’s not the only reason I asked you here.” Zoro furrowed his brow a little bit, trying to parse what else the surgeon of death could possibly need from him. “It’s not exactly medically sound, and I’ve never tried it myself, but I’ve been told that when I seperate someone’s heart from their body, pleasure and pain cease to be felt.” 

“I don’t understand.” 

Law sighed and stood up straight from his leaning position. “I can take your heart. I’ll keep it in the fridge, it’ll be safe. Just until we meet back up in Wano.” He paused. “With the cook.” 

He was offering to relieve Zoro of the pain of losing Sanji. Relieve him from the regret and tribulation that filled him to the brim at any given time. It would, as Law had said, cease to be felt. It seemed like the easy way out, and Zoro didn’t like doing anything with ease. This wasn’t like when he had taken Luffy’s pain back on Thriller Bark - less tangible, which made it harder to forget. It didn’t help that there was nothing to do on the Tang besides dwell on it. But there was no changing what had happened, and it wouldn’t be forever. Zoro believed in Luffy. Believed he would bring Sanji back to them. To him. 

Zoro nodded, and Law uncrossed his arms and began walking over the hospital side of the room. He patted the operating table, signaling for Zoro to lay down on it. Zoro did as he was instructed after taking off his shirt. The steel of the cold table pierced through the paper and onto his back muscles, making him shiver. 

Law pulled a marker out of his pocket and began painting a small dotted line around the left side of Zoro’s chest. 

“Why are you doing this?” Zoro asked.

“I know what it’s like,” he said, not looking up from the heart shaped line he was drawing on Zoro’s skin. Zoro raised his good eyebrow, and the dark haired man continued. “To feel like you failed someone. Cycling through things you wish you could have told them in your head, until you’re so warped with regrets that you feel like you’ll never be anything but overflowing with self hatred again.” Once finished with is philosophical musing, Law pulled away and took a look at the outline. 

“Room,” Law said, swiping his hand around, and bringing forth a light blue bubble that encapsulated the study in its soft glow. His placed his hand over the outline on Zoro’s chest. “Flex your chest muscles and inhale deeply, then hold your breath until I tell you to stop.” Zoro did as he was told. Absently, he inhaled like he was taking a drag of a cigarette, which, out of habit, made him disobey Law and measure out his exhale afterwards. 

“Scalpel.” There was a sharp pang that might not have happened if he had been holding his breath like Law had said. And then suddenly, the absence of anything. 

When he opened his eyes, Law was holding a gelatinous cube with what Zoro guessed was his heart inside. It was a strange disconnect, forcing Zoro’s hands to flutter to his chest where there was a square hole going directly through him. Law smiled briefly and turned around to put a code into the keypad on the fridge which opened with a small pop. 

“It’ll be in here. If you want it back before we get there, just find me,” he said, waving briefly and exiting the room. 

Just like that, Zoro was alone in the room. He touched the hole in his chest again, feeling only the emptiness of air where his flesh and blood should be. The overwhelming desire for a cigarette splashed upon him right before he looked over to the small table beside him, housing a single cigarette and a box of matches.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm just making shit up when it comes to law's devil fruit. bastardization of ope ope no mi is a go.


	7. Six

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> self beta'd. trigger warnings for vomiting and minor verbal homophobia cuz the vinsmokes are terrible.

Sanji felt like he was going to throw up, and the carriage’s constant rocking wasn’t helping. Cradling his pounding head in his hands, his fingers tangled in with his sweaty hair, making him feel even more nauseous. 

“I think I’m going to-” but before he could even finish he was vomiting all over the carriage’s floor.

“Gross!” Ichiji shouted, moving his shoes backwards, and out of the way. 

“Ugh! What’d you do that for, Sanji?” Yonji piled on, until it was just a cacophony of his brothers wretched laughter. 

Wiping the last of the vomit off his jaw, Sanji clenched his fists as tight as he could, his nails digging crescent moons into his palms. He had learned to expect nothing of his family, especially his brothers, but it didn’t stop him from hoping they could at least keep their mouths shut after what had just happened.

“Was that red head your girl, Sanji?” Niji asked, his arms outstretched across the entire back lip of the bench. 

“Damn, she was a real looker, huh, Yonji?” Ichiji commented.

“Oh, hell yeah. I’d tap her as hard as she slapped Sanji!”

Next thing Sanji knew he had Yonji by the collar of his hideous Germa garb, his face inches away from his brother’s. “Don’t say anything else about Nami.” 

Yonji flashed a smarmy smile, before he pushed Sanji off of him, throwing him back into his seat with so much force it made the carriage rattle. It knocked the air out of Sanji’s lungs, and he had to heave to regain the ability to breathe. Reiju looked at Sanji out of the corner of her eye, but refused to engage in anything her siblings were doing. She had always been like that. She may have been the reason Sanji escaped them originally, but she was just as much under  
Judge’s thumb as Sanji was. Just had more experience with dealing with it.

“Anyways, don’t be stupid, Niji. Sanji doesn’t swing that way,” Yonji said, straightening his collar. They all broke out in laughter again, Ichiji doing a crude dick sucking motion as they did. 

Collapsing into the bench next to Reiju, Sanji elected to look out the window, trying desperately to think of anything but the swirling sorrow in his chest. If he looked in the distance he could see the field where he had beat up Luffy, the sight of it making Sanji’s stomach contort once again. The carriage stopped, and the Vinsmokes began to file out. Reiju silently skirted around Sanji’s vomit while Ichiji loudly complained about its smell. 

“We’re never using that carriage again.” Judge growled once Sanji trudged out behind them. Sanij was silent, just waiting for when they could all go to their separate rooms and he would be able to cry like he had been wanting to since his clash with the Strawhats. It was hurting to hold back the tears, a few still escaping, and it was giving him a headache to compound with the nausea.

He might as well just die of this sickness, he thought as he followed his brothers down the hallway. Ichji, Niji, and Yonji all entered one room, and started taunting Sanji for wanting not wanting to come with them. Why did they even care? That was a stupid question, they just wanted a reason to call him a useless crybaby for the thirtieth time today. 

Slamming the large gold door behind him, Sanji fell, facedown, onto the huge bed in the chateau. He felt sick, and hopeless. He just hoped he could pass out from the exhaustion that flowed through every vein in his body, but after a few minutes when sleep didn’t take him, he realized it was futile to even hope for a moment's reprieve. 

Sanji rolled over and stared at the fancy crown molding lining the ceiling. Absentmindedly, he fidgeted with the gold cuffs dangling around both his wrists. There was no way to get them off without dentonating them, Judge would have made sure of that. Tears pricked at the corners of Sanji’s eyes as he held back a furious cough. He couldn’t even smoke in here. They had taken everything away from him, and still kept taking more. What would he even be left with after the Vinsmokes left him here.

Sanji sighed, coughing while he did. Curling up in a ball in the middle of the bed, he let himself cry for only a moment. Not too long, lest one of his brother’s barge in, unannounced, and use it as fuel on the fire for their merciless taunting.  


He opened his eyes after crying and looked at the rose bush outside the room’s window. It had a very familiar green color. Sanji scrunched his eyes closed, and pinched the bridge of his nose.

Zoro...He hadn’t come to Whole Cake with Luffy and the rest. Maybe Sanji had pushed him away too far after the whole non-reciprocated ‘I love you’ thing. Maybe Zoro had given up on him. It hurt to think about, perhaps even more than anything else that was going on right now. Could things have been different if Sanji had never said those words? Or if he had just let it go? 

He hugged himself, pretending it was Zoro’s arms around him, making him feel safe and cared for like they used to. And for one precious moment it worked. 

“Want me to slice those bastards in half?” Sanji could almost hear Zoro’s voice say it. His sharp tongue cutting the words like his swords through stone. His buttery tone that he used when he was sweet talking Sanji juxtaposed so well against his gravelly voice.

Sanj’s hand moved on it’s own, slipping in between his skin and his dress pants. He imagined Zoro on top of him, propped up on his elbow, flashing that sly grin he always wore when he was in the mood. Sanji imagined Zoro unbuckling his pants and saying something stupid about how excited he was despite not having been touched yet. And Zoro, never doing anything with tact, taking him in his large hands and giving him the worst, most chafing heavy, hand job ever. But it was amazing because it was Zoro. He screwed his eyes shut, imagining Zoro’s rough, calloused hands instead of his own. 

A warm feeling pooled in his hips, and shaft. Mounting ever faster from the intense imagery his exhausted mind was bringing forth. Bucking his hips up he came with a white hot flash, his brain going fuzzy for longer than usual. And for another perfect second, everything that was wrong right now, wasn’t. 

“Messy, messy, messy,” he heard Zoro’s voice say before it faded away and Sanji was left with himself, the sound of brother’s laughing at him outside the door, ruined pants, and the staticy feeling of his body as he drifted off to sleep.


End file.
